I Know, Alright

Last night I accidentally went on a date to a gay bar with a man I met on Craigslist when I bought his bed and then hung out with drunk UVA law students that wore belts with fish on them.

I promise I can explain.

If you remember a few posts ago, I talked about Jean Pierre, aka Eric, the guy that tied the bed to the top of my car with a speaker wire in the pouring rain. Well, a few days later he asked me out. And then asked me out a few days after that. And a few days after that. When I couldn’t avoid any longer I said yes because, well, for one, I have a hard time saying no sometimes and the guy really did bail me out . What’s one drink and some surfacy conversation for an hour?

So, last night was the night. While I do know that each and every one of my decisions up to this point have been sketchy at best, I do think I deserve some credit for begging my roommate LJ to come on my date with me. We met my/our date in Dupont- us in summer dresses having just come from Friday jazz in the park, him sportin’ the white linen suit. Obviously, he was taking this seriously. I shot LJ the “I so owe you look” while she shot back the “you’re such an idiot” look. Fair enough.

Eric, born in Cameroon and schooled in France, really wanted to go Adams Morgan. We hopped in his car (I know!) and drove up the road about 5 minutes and then in circles for 10 looking for parking. Again, why I agreed to this, I don’t know. Already thinking escape route, I suggested the first bar we saw upon parking the car. In my desperation, I failed to notice the rainbows and multi-colored Christmas lights decorating the patio outside. It actually didn’t even don on me til we’d been in there for at least 10 minutes. I won’t tell you how I figured it out. Again, LJ shot the “you’re such an idiot” my way. (I know, okay!)

Long story short, he talked the whole hour and fifteen we were with him. And he really is a nice guy. Really. Just, not my type. We made our escape right as one of his friends showed up, presumably for LJ. I didn’t realize it until we were on our way to meet my Craigslist prince that while I was making LJ go with me, I would also be repaying her that night by going with her to a party where she only knew this one guy her cousin had introduced her to…begin scene two.

We walked a few blocks to the house bracing ourselves for another would-be good story. The good news about the rest of the night is that there is really no awkwardness to report. The UVA/Baylor crowd in attendance was welcoming and interesting. Conversation flowed. New friends everywhere. At one point, LJ and I were talking to Ben who had had maybe one margarita too many. After demonstrating his knowledge of Darren’s Dance Grooves, somehow, we got on the topic of slavery. (Warning: this is what happens when you invite IJMers to parties.) I really hope he remembers what he learned because I must say that LJ and I gave a very informative and passionate tag-team presentation. I think I even saw a tear forming in his left eye at one point. Maybe he was just tired.

It was about 30 minutes into our slavery speech that I glanced over and realized that there was a guy, my age, with a fish belt and boat shoes, khaki shorts that hit above the knee and a button-down shirt tucked it. But let me reiterate, he had a fish belt. A belt with fish on it. I looked around and started noticing what other guys were wearing. It was more or less the same variation that outfit. A UVA belt. Tan boat shoes, brown boat shoes. Pastels. Khaki shorts, no pleats. Everything tucked in. Maybe you’re used to southern frat boy culture, but I’m telling you, I cannot get used to it. It makes me laugh out lout almost every time I see it. I used to wonder how in the world L.L. Bean stays in business. Now I know. I also know, even more shockingly, that it is those born in the same year as me keeping it in business.

We decided to grab a cab home and the night was officially topped off when the cabbie’s radio blared “It’s Rainin’ Men, Hallelujah!” all the way back to Maryland Ave. Hallelujah, indeed.

Safe, sound and happy-
Your, LC